he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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