Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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