brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
At least make sure they are 18
Why
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
