I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
cat food counts as protein by the way
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
