all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
