Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Randomize
