Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
