I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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