Tell her she can't have a vagina
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
