Little spoons don't ask big questions
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.�
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
