smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
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