i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
