I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
