we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
