He kissed a someone with a penis
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
