When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
