I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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