is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I don't deserve a penis
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
