I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
