So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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