Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
