Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
