let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
