K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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