Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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