on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
