We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
