Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
