i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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