My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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