this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
