Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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