You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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