the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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