i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
this hospital has no fireball
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
