He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
