its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Randomize
