So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
