Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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