i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
