Nicole vs. Life
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
