There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
