Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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