i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
