Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
