What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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