I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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