i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
