I'm lost and stupid without you.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
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