from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
